Encounter of the rapists is not just the correct justice we should or she should get. I was probably happy for just those few 10 seconds. But somehow I feel sad for her. Justice is when such things are prevented or stopped from occurring. I just feel this encounter is to wash off the guilt the police had in themselves for not doing what they had to do at the right time. Only their guilt was served justice. I don't feel secured yet, just because 4 rapists were encountered. I probably will when all the rapists are encountered. If the police had acted so efficiently on that day, she would have been alive. Why is it that only in movies we see such situations to be handled even before they occur? The Unnao victim was burnt ? Who is our government or justice protecting?
Have been hearing many such incidents in the past, to be frank none of those affected me personally like this. Like i would feel bad for few days, cry, hope and pray for them. But I was never scared to walk out alone or it dint effect my daily routine.
This time, probably because it happened in my city, the place where i grew up, which i thought was very safe proved me wrong.
I was thinking until recently that I am a very strong woman, i go to the gym regularly, pretty strong enough to tackle a man or probably two. If attacked anytime, I would think I should first kick his groins, poke my nails directly into his eyes and run away. What if I'm outnumbered ? Will a pepper spray or 100 save me ?
Just 4 days ago , I had to buy medicines but as the medical store near my house dint have a parking space, I parked my car a little ahead . Walking those 650metres was the first time I encountered this fear in me. With that constant fear i was looking around at people i was passing by. To my fear I had to cross a group of young labour boys smoking cigars. Each face of theirs looked like a rapist to me. A rapist face in my mind are the ones of nirbaya or disha's. Why should I be so frightened? They might be good people or bad people or just people. I was praying to be safe all through that 650metres to and fro. I kept telling myself it's just 8.30 pm, my mind said disha happened at 9.30 pm . So many women work at night shifts, how scared should they be ?
On my way back home i had these thoughts which made me feel helpless.
1) I should have ordered medicines home, but again I even had got sexual harrassment messages and calls from delivery boys too in the previous 1 year.(not once,twice)
2) Then the thought of having ordered them with instructions to deliver the medicines to our security had crossed my mind. But our security drinks almost everyday and even raises his hand on his wife. How do i trust him either ?
So ultimately I can't trust young boys or drunk people or the matter of fact any man i dont know.
Do we have to be dependent on our fathers or brothers or husband for even such minor things ? What is women empowerment then ?
3 month old to 65 year old grand mothers are not spared. Why ?
What should change ? Should girls just stop stepping out of their houses or should the boys be educated enough to be able to differentiate between sexual pleasure and sexual harrasments?
Call 100, carrying pepper sprays, syringes, knifes, does this only imply that we are safe ? I somehow feel every women should be given a gun and they will seek their own justice. Instead of playing "no smoking" advertisements before every movie in the theatres, videos of how rapists will be treated for their heinous crimes should be played.
When i read advices from people saying she should have called 100 instead of her sister, it reminded me of the incident I encountered. Once when i ordered something online and after the delivery was done, I got a message from the delivery executive saying hi. I ignored it. I was assuming a feedback column will be asked later. The next day i again got a msg saying hi teja. I ignored it again wondering how does he know my name. I assumed probably from the app i ordered. After 10 minutes i get obscene messages from that guy for which I had to take an action.
I immediately made many calls to get the number of the owner of that food delivery chain. The owner a very nice person took this personally and went to the police station himself to take necessary actions. Ultimately i get a call that i have to go to the police station too as a victim to file a case. By the time we reached the station, the owner and his friends were waiting for us (my husband and me ). I was very thankful for what the owner has done. He said he has a baby girl and what was done to me is just not acceptable.
The delivery boy deleted his messages from his phone, which anyway the cyber crime can retrieve.
The police gave me 2 options
1) File a FIR against the delivery boy, but he will come out by bail in a week. And then we can take it to court ,but madam you have to keep coming to the court everytime called and you should be explaining everything to them in detail everytime.
2) we can give him a warning and leave him tomorrow morning.
I was scared. My main concern was that the delivery executive knows where I live, what if he comes home sometime when my husband is not around ? My another concern was why should i be answerable to all of them when i had given them enough evidence about the harrasment why should i be explaining myself in court ? I really felt that the police themselves portrayed the 1st option in a way that i will not opt for it, reasons unknown. Even if i file an FIR,the boy gets released anyway in a week, and he would definitely hold a grudge against me and end up infront of my house. I was confused, scared. I did not file an FIR. I was told to call 100 for any emergency. I did not have a peaceful sleep for almost a month later.
I can't change the rules and laws. Nor does voicing what's in my mind changes anything. I just want everyone like me to feel safe. I should be scared of my sins but not someone's sins.
I do not want to be weak. I do not want to be taken for granted. I do not want to be scared. I want to live. Sexual harrasments occur to both men and women. But the men numbers are negligible.
Education is not the only solution for this, such things happen even in high well educated societies. I don't know what is. I hope the intellectuals do something strong against it.
A No is a No
